he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
