i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize
