i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
She made me pour olive oil on her.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
