Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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