Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
