____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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