Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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