Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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