question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Enjoy the penises
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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