she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
