I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
high people should be assigned attendants
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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