There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
