ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
false alarm. still invincible.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive