Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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