hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
