Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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