Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize