dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
