Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
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