woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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