Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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