awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
