I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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