He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
