Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
