Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
