i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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