Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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