YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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