Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Congratulations! We have a period
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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