Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
