Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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