So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex