no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
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