Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?

(313): View more from Michigan

YES

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(616): View more from Michigan

U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers

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(425): View more from Washington

be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant

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(517): View more from Michigan

Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...

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(216): View more from Ohio

there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina

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(407): View more from Florida

Your cock is gonna weep like a baby

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(816): View more from Missouri

After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?

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(316): View more from Kansas

You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows

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