is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
