i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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