So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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