you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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