I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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