I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
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