And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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