woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
