But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
