Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
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