I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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