so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
this must be what syphilis tastes like
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
