I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
