Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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