Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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